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Kampala: There was a time…

Yes, time affects all things…

Changing times: Life changes, every era brings its own fascinations, obsessions, trends, heroes, and crazes. Every generation thinks of itself better than the previous one. Yet, in every generation, we learn one thing; that change is constant, that things will come and go, that we should kusala pulessa and that we should practice the ideals of tokisussa. So, let’s talk about the era before this…

There was a time when Straka was the celebrity of choice, when thousands of people stayed up just to catch her late night show. There was a time when all ladies benchmarked Straka’s head for their next hairstyling session. There was a time when winning a PAM Award was the dream of every artiste.

There was a time when everyone thought Michael Ezra was the richest Ugandan that ever lived. There was a time when this Ugandan was bidding for Leeds United. Do not joke with the times. There was a time when SWASA graduates were stepping on our heads. Now, they are flying our planes. But there was a time when dating a SWASA campuser came with a surcharge. Who were you to date a SWASA girl?

There was a time when guys who owned specials were taking every good thing around town. The conversations in town would read like; “Can you imagine, that girl is too lucky, she got a guy who owns a Special.” Those were the days when men would belt up in Loketo style.

Then came the phones. If you did not pay service fee over and above airtime, you have not seen days. Your Sim card did not come like any other ordinary card. It came in a Sim Pack. Those days the man and woman of the day would wave around their Sim packs. Relax my sister, there was a time when a Nokia 3310 was the iPhone of the day. Entire generations made marriage decisions based on the Nokia 3310. Go slow, speed controle, Afrigo Band would sing.

Gone are the days when Steers and Debonairs could earn you lifetime respect. Having a photo session at ‘Mega Pix’ was a dream come true. There was a time when children played games around ‘Omuceere n’enyama’. When sodas only appeared on Christmas day. There was a time when competition was around which household has used the most saucepans.

There was a time when Property Masters was the talk around town, when we thought all land in this country was owned by Property Masters. When we heard the words Property Masters, we simply responded with ‘Bakasulu’.

We all need to be humble in life because the gold today could as well be the copper of tomorrow. Who knew that there would come a time when Utoda would be no more? We all knew that Utoda was the taxi and the taxi was Utoda. There was a time when Education was Namirembe Bitamazire and Namirembe was Education. Who knew that there would come a time and the Cool Cool Bar Generation would now be causing havoc on Bandali Rise?

There was a time when Generals were Generals. When Generals would close off entire roads to throw a party. There was a time when army commanders owned bands. There was a time when Bebe Cool stepped on tables to make a name. There was a time when the Chameleones of this world were alleged to have gone under water to ground their talent. And we all believed the stories for years. What really fascinated us about this under-water trip? Do not get us started on the Shadows story. But there was a time when day and night, Kampala discussed nothing but people who were meeting the devil. Back then, we had more people meeting the devil. Today, pastors are meeting God along the Entebbe Expressway. Prophets keep travelling to heaven and back.

There was a time when KPC was the thing. When Pastor Sempa was a Sempa, when thousands signed abstinence pledge cards, when we had to know abbreviations such as COWE and UWESO. Who knew that there would come a time when everything would go Greek from Zoe to Phaneroo?

You could be the coolest thing in town now, but give it time, and we would probably not remember your name in the next two years. There was a time when Shimoni Demonstration School was the Ivy of primary schools. Little did we know that it would now be a shopping complex. Did we tell you that the school had produced the mightiest science teacher in Uganda? The Great Mr Kigozi. There was a time in Uganda when teachers were celebrities. When engineers were celebrities. Little did we know that there would come a time when genius would be something to drag down and mediocrity would get celebrated. Yes, time affects all things. Nothing in the world survives contact with time.

Just as there was a time, there will also be a time when the great of today will be no more. When the things that make us panic or lose our heads will be no more. There will come a time when Naalya will be the Karen of Uganda. There will come a time when people will realise that it should be normal for a man to afford a bottle of whisky. That one can travel abroad without threatening the peace on social media streets! There will come a time when you will all get a chance to see Frank Gashumba in Forbes magazine!

Twitter: ortegatalks

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